Sunday, January 22, 2006

"Go Cut Me A Switch!!"

When I wuz a young'un, When I ever got out'a line, my Daddy would sometimes send me ta get him a switch.

Most of ya know what a switch is, but fer those of ya what don't, I'll 'splain it up fer ya...

A switch is a piece of equipment made out of wood, long and slender, usually a simple branch cut from a small tree in the yard. You flick it at strategic times and locations in order to change a young'un's mind. (Usually works like a charm, too.)

In some families, it also proves to be a great source of Cardio-Vascular Exercise for Dad as well.

My Daddy would make me go and cut my own switch (and it better be a good'un, too, or he would go and get one that HE liked, and tha beatin' would be twiced as bad...), and most of the time, just havin' ta go and do that wuz enuff ta cause me ta straighten up. When it wadn't, Dad would grab my arm with one hand, and flick tha switch against my lower hind leg with the other, and I would holler and hop around and around him while he installed my new "striped stockin's."

And I was not allowed to cry about it afterward, neither. Dad would tell me "Dry up, now. If you had done what I told you in the first place, then this wouldn't have happened to you."

It taught me a lot of different lessons all at once. One is, do what you are supposed to do. Obey and respect authority, or you will be punished. Another one is, If you don't, and you get punished, then it is your own fault. Another one still, is that nobody wants to hear you complain about what happened to you because of the trouble you got yourself into.

Dad believed that corporal punishment should always be the last resort, but was sometimes necessary, and Dad as a rule did what he had to do, whatever that was.

Have y'all ever had a switchin'?

Did'ya hafta cut yer own switch?

Did'ya larn' anything?

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Grits!! Mmmmmm...

Ah got this'n here from a website called Country Humor . com...

The Ten Commandments of Grits...

1. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits

2. Thou shalt not eat thy Grits with a spoon

3. Thou shalt not eat Cream of Wheat and call it Grits for this is blasphemy

4. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors Grits

5. Thou shalt only use Salt, Butter and Cheese as toppings for thy Grits. (They left out "Red-Eye Gravy... -TBC)

6. Thou shalt not eat Instant Grits

7. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits

8. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits.

9. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits.

10. Thou shalt not put sugar on thy Grits either.

Note - In this context, "Grits does not mean "girls raised in the south". Ya'll can put syrup on those, iff'n ya want to, and if she don't mind...jest don't put no syrup on the kind made out'n corn that ya cook fer breakfust.

Do ya'll like grits? I love 'em!!